Hujoshi Webdrama
by Vampia Zee
Summary: An old old Webdrama from Hujoshi days....*Yaoi~*


Narriator: In town a crime was...*in rapper voice* happinin!! *back to normal voice* crooks and badgers and now loose in our city...who will save it!?!?   
  
Lost citizen: Look it's a bird!   
  
Timmy traped in well: No it's a jet!!   
  
Dog taking a piss : No its a Trowa!!   
  
Old woman crossing the street : it's not just any ordinary Trowa!!   
  
Me in the crowd : IT'S TROMAN!!!  
  
Nightcat: *taking photo* Troman! Can ya pose for a photo?   
  
Troman: Sure! *show nightcat a 'V' sign* There?   
  
Nightcat: Thankz!!! *glomps* Bye!!!   
  
Troman: *sweatdrop* what am i suppose to do now? *look around*   
  
Quatre: *runs up* Trowa! What are you doing Dress up like that again!?!?   
  
Troman: O.\\ *covers hand over Quatres Mouth* shhush! They arnt to know my true self....   
  
Quatre: well could you at least tell me why you are out in the middle of a city. dress like Wonder Woman. and calling youself Troman?   
  
Troman:......to tell you the truth I forgot...   
  
Quatre:....-_-;; well lets go home then..   
  
Troman: ok. *they walk off*   
  
Background: *city on fire and people running around screaming their heads off*   
  
~*Outside Duo's Apartment*~  
  
Nightcat: *outside of Duo appartment* *scratch head* i'm going to do it.......or maybe not?   
  
Duo: *open the door suddenly and hit Nightcat*   
  
Nightcat: Ah!!! *drops on the floor* @_@ Itai!!!   
  
Duo: Oh my! You ok??? *help nightcat up* why are you here anyways?   
  
Nightcat: i was... *sniff* going to let ya know about.....   
  
Heero: *step out of the door* Speak up! Neko! Or i'll drop you out of the top floor! *veins pop out*   
  
Nightcat: *sweatdrops* i'll come back when you guy's are free!!!! *runs away*   
  
Duo: What was up with that? *looks over at Heero* You scared her off didnt you!?   
  
Heero: Don't blame me!   
  
~*else where*~  
  
  
  
Wufei: *drinking Tea* and so you see if you run down the street and turn left you will hit the cobweb which i Have ploted for Troman's demise.   
  
Vamp: So I see.....and if I get stuck in them before him?   
  
Wufei: you will be traped in them but it will be much fun trying to get free. It's like being in a giant jumpy thingy.....*looks around* hey! O.o where did she go!?   
  
Vamp: *running down the street*   
  
~*elsewhere elsewhere*~   
  
Quatre:....   
  
Trowa:.....* not in his wonder woman outfit anymore*   
  
Quatre: That's disterbing....   
  
Trowa: whats disterbing? The fact that Cobwebs are that big? or the fact that someone is hoping around in them?   
  
Quatre:........both....   
  
*both walk off to Duo's house*   
  
Vamp: wooo! look at meeeeeee!!! weeeeee!!! *web snaps and vamp falls to the ground* ....ouch...ies?...X.X  
  
Nightcat: *sniff* *sniff* nani? *look on the ground and saw Vamp* what are ya doing? *start talking to herself* i was going to Duo home to ask if he know's about this....*show Vamp a picture where Trowa is in wonder woman outfit* but heero comes out with a scary look. .~ that he scared me away from the appartment and now i'm no where but to go look for Wu-chan....*sniff* You see him anywhere? *sniff* *look at Vamp who's still not talking to herself* *sigh* i don't know......i'm lost! .~~~~~ *shake Vamp* COuld ya speak up and help?????? Hello?????   
  
Wu Fei: *saw nightcat shaking Vamp like hell* Oi! What are ya doing??? *stop nightcat* you wanna kill people???   
  
Nightcat: *sniff* what???? Even Wu-chan is like Heero??? .~ *runs away*  
  
Wufei: O.O *looks around then looks down at Vamp then looks around again* I didnt do it! *runs off and runs into Trieze*   
  
Trieze: Did you capture Troman? I was just coming to see if he is stuck in the giant cob web which I have created! *walks around the corner* O.O;;; What is this child doing dead in my cobweb!?   
  
Wufei: *runs*  
  
Narriator: back at Duo appartment where Duo is being tie up with ropes and naked!!!   
  
Heero: there there.......Duo...you're hiding something from me?*get close to Duo* common..tell me......   
  
Duo: *sweatdrops* what is the sudden of this?? Heero-chan? *blink blink* I don't have anything to hide from you....you know it!! Let me go now!   
  
Heero: *evil grin* If there's noting ya hiding........Why is that Baka neko here just now? I know she's the spy around town...and she have been hire by some one...*hold Duo's chin up to meet his eye* Nani desuka? Duo.........   
  
Duo: *blink blink* i din't hire her and i don't even know she's a spy! *look stright into Heero's eye* Fuck you! Let me go now! You're hurting me!   
  
Heero: *grins* oh? it's hurting? *licks Duo on the neck* But don't you like it when i do this to you? Duo-chan~ *evil smile*   
  
Duo: Baka! Nan ze! The hell i like it! *blushing* let me go! If not.......! Ah!   
  
Heero: *bite's Duo's neck* Tell the truth.........or i'll not let you free.....   
  
Wufei: *bursts threw the door and runs into the room sees whats going on then faints* x.x   
  
Duo: O.o;;;   
  
Heero: *didnt notice it*   
  
Narrator:Somewhere not too far away...   
  
Relena: (Sets binoculars down) Oh! that evil Duo. forcing my Heero into doing something so perverted!   
  
Dorothy:but Miss Relena. how can Duo force Heero when Heero has tied him up?   
  
Relena: because...*sweatdrop* He's evil! And now I have something to stop him from his evil ways.*walk over to an object covered by a sheet and pulls it off* I present to you Hee-bot!   
  
Dorothy:...*sweatdrop*   
  
Relena: hee-bot is twica as strong as Heero and will rid the world of that evil braided twit and bring my Heero to me! Now all I have to do is insert this picture of Duo and Heero into his memory and Voila! Heero is mine.   
  
Hee-bot:Mission accepted * burst through the walls*   
  
Dorothy: Relena. you inserted a picture with all the gundam pilots. how will Hee-bot possibly know who to kill and who to capture?!   
  
Relena:...oh...Oh no!!!! HEERO I must warn him!   
  
Dorothy: you think?   
  
Relena: on to the peace mobile. forked-browed girl!   
  
Dorothy:sigh...  
  
Narrator: Back into the appartment where Wu-chan is still on the floor..fainted....-_-   
  
Duo: ano.....*sweatdrop* can we help that guy over there? HEERO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! STOP BITING!!!!!!   
  
Heero: *busy biting on Duo's neck and slowly moving his way to a nipple* Shut up.....There's no one around...No one will help you....   
  
Duo: Goddamnit!!! Ahhh!!! Stop that!!! WHy do you do this at the beginning????????? *trying to break free*   
  
Heero: *look at Duo* I don't remamber.........   
  
Duo: O_O'''''   
  
Wu Fei: *getting up* ow....I tought i saw something horrible....*look up to where Duo was still being tie up and Heero trying to kiss Duo* OH! *fainted* X.X   
  
Duo: Wait!!! Wait!!! Wu-chan!! Don't faint!! Help me!!!! *tear* Wait!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!   
  
Heero: Hn....Kudaran! *kiss Duo*   
  
Narrator: a mysterious person watches   
  
Treize: How many times has the dragon fainted exactly?*sips wine*   
  
Random Ozzie#1: We've lost count. your excellency   
  
Treize:Sticking that camera in Heero and Duo's apartment has proven to be quite...educating. I want you guys to go there and bring me back the dragon   
  
Random Ozzie#2: But your excellency. how are we to do that?   
  
Treize: Just make out with each other that will surely make my little dragon unconsciouss. Now off with you! Oh. my dragon. how I've waited for you!*Prepares candles. lubes. roses. oils. bathwater. rose petels. silk sheets...and so on*  
  
Narrator: And off in anouther. anouther part of the town at a nice little tea shop...   
  
Trowa:........*looks around*   
  
Quatre:*takes a sip of his tea then sets it down* What is it Trowa?   
  
Trowa: *in a wavy voice* My spidy sence is tingling...   
  
Me in the back: XD!! *dissapeasrs*   
  
Quatre:......? what?   
  
Trowa: O.\\\   
  
Quatre: .......*turns around* O.O!!!   
  
Hee-bot: First ones in picture found. destruction commence.   
  
Trowa and Quatre: *leg it over to Duo's apartment*   
  
Narrator:and back to Duo's place   
  
Random Ozzie#2: So this is the place?   
  
Ozzie #1:says so on the address...   
  
Ozzie #2: Treize doesn't expect us to really make out does he?   
  
Ozzie #1: Shhhhh. Listen...*sounds of moaning coming through the door*Hmmmmm. it's open* spies through crack* Chang is unconscious on the floor and the other two are...erm. busy! They won't notice us.   
  
Ozzie #2:Ok *pushes door open and nearly gets a nose bleed and drags Wufei out of the room*   
  
Ozzie #1:That was easy now let's get him back to Master Treize.   
  
Ozzie #2:What do you think his excellency wants him for?   
  
Ozzie #1:You don't want to know. you reeeeaaaallllly don't want to know...   
  
Ozzie #2:aw. c'mon man tell me *sticks wufei in trunk of car and drives off* I'll just ask Treize himself.hmph   
  
*the cat jump out middle of the road to stop the car*   
  
Ozzie #1 and #2 : WTF!!! *the car stops in a full break*   
  
Ozzie #2: Oi! Baka neko!! Wanna die!   
  
Cat: O_O'''' Glad i'm still alive......   
  
Ozzie #1: Get out of our way!   
  
Ozzie #2: Just run the baka neko with the car!   
  
Cat: GIve me back Wu-chan!! Or i'll scream and cry!   
  
Ozzie #1: *laugh out loud* Ah ha ha ha ha! You think that's gonna do?   
  
Cat: *sniff*   
  
Ozzie #2: Great........that's just great......*sweatdrops*   
  
Cat: *burst out tear and start crying* Ah!!!!!!!! Thay took my papa away!!! They kidnaped him!! and they wanna leave me alone without my papa!!! Waaaaaaaaa!!!!! Help me!!!!   
  
*People at the street gethering around*   
  
People #1: Ah....how bad! They took the child's father?   
  
People #2: Oi! You two big no-thinking old thing! HOw could you take the inoccent child's father?? *trows a stone and break the glass of the car*   
  
Ozzie #1: *sweatdrops* ok......that's working.......What do we do now?   
  
Ozzie #2:Run the car on them all......... People all around surrounding the car   
  
People: *trying to break open the door*   
  
Cat: *evil smile* See....i told ya not to make me do anything bad.....he he he he~   
  
Ozzie #1: *being dragging out the car* Ah!!! Hold on!! Hold on!!!! What are you people gonna do!!!   
  
Ozzie #2: Let me go!!!! Let me go!!!   
  
Wu fei: -_- huh? what happend?   
  
~*else where*~  
  
Treize:*tapping fingers on silk sheets* where is my dragon?!! I know those morons captured him. so where are they?   
  
Wufei: *barges in* Treize!!! your lackeys threw me in the trunk of a car and--*silenced as Treize places two fingers on his lips*   
  
Treize: Hush. sweet dragon. A nice warm bath will soothe you.   
  
wufei: You don't mean a bath with you do you?   
  
Treize: Yes. I think a bath with you will be nice thanks for suggesting it!   
  
wufei: But that's not what I meant...*passes out*   
  
Treize: dear. we'll just have to break you from that nasty habit.  
  
*back at Duo's apartment*   
  
Quatre and Trowa: *burst in through the door*   
  
Quatre: now why did we come here?   
  
Trowa:....I don't know...   
  
Hee-bot: *some how got distracted by a store that sells gundam things and is distroying it*   
  
Quatre: oh yea! we have to tell everyone that that thing is trying to kill us!   
  
Trowa: right...*they walk into the other room with all the moaning*   
  
Quatre and Trowa:..........   
  
Quatre: *picks up a shoe and chunks it at heero's head*   
  
Heero: Omae o korosu! *some how gets a gun and pokes it in Quatre's face*  
  
Duo: ooooh. look! It's Trojan man! Can I have some free condoms?!   
  
Heero:...?   
  
Quatre:....   
  
Trowa:.....   
  
Quatre:That's Tro-man!!! Not Trojan man!!! *turns bright pink*   
  
Heero:*digs gun at Quatre's skull harder* What did you come here for?   
  
Quatre: Wait. I know it was something!!! Um....*taps finger to temple and sticks tongue to the side to remember* Um. Trowa. help here?   
  
Trowa:*entranced by Duo's naked form* His body's like Kryptonite...   
  
Narrator:at the same moment   
  
Heebot:*fascinated with gun shop* Oooooo pretty gun *cuddles with it* I wuv you.   
  
~*Back to apartment*~  
  
  
  
Heero:If you keep staring at Duo then then *thinks for a few minutes* Omae o Korosu!!!   
  
Quatre:That was really anti-climatic...   
  
Narrator:We guess the pilots is forgeting someone?   
  
Cat: Er......Wu-chan?   
  
Narrator: Yus....Back to Duo's appartment.   
  
Cat: *runs into the appartment and kicked Heero on his head* Oi! Baka!! We have to go save Wu-chan!! .~   
  
Heero: *aim gun at cat and trys to shoot her* Kill you!!! How dare you kick a pretty guy like me!! Baka neko!!!!! *still shooting* Die!!!   
  
all the others: O_O''''''   
  
Cat: Ah! *hides* We need to save Wu-chan!!! Treize got him!!!!!! If we don't make that fast....Wu-chan will be rape by him!!!!!   
  
Heero: *reload gun* Who the [toot] care???? *shoot*   
  
Duo: *was untie by Quatre* Heero! Enough! She's got a point!! We have to get Wu fei out! *wear cloth*   
  
Quatre: *nods* I can imagine with will Treize do to him.....   
  
Trowa: *imagine* *faint*   
  
everyone: O_O''''' What's with the fainting thing going on in the room?????   
  
~*back to where ever trieze is*~  
  
Vamp: *crawling on the roof like some bug*   
  
Wufei: *walks in room and looks up* .............whats that?   
  
Trieze: *putting cell phone away after finish talking on it* Sorry wu-dragon. But we will have to wait till later for play time...we have some thing in my room...   
  
Wufei:....i see that...um ...i will come back later...bye! *runs for the door*   
  
*Before Wufei makes it to the door a squad of bug killer people bash threw the door knocking him back*   
  
Bug killer #1: Ok where is the bug!!   
  
Trieze: *points up*   
  
Bug killer #2: whoa! Thats a biggin' yup yup! thats a biggin yup!   
  
*suddenly room is flooded with bug killer people*   
  
Vamp: OO *crawls around*   
  
Wufei:This is a mass injustice!!!   
  
Treize:Do you even know what your justice ranting about...   
  
Bug Killer #2:*shoots bugspray at Wufei's butt* We have to kill that bug up his butt.   
  
Wufei:How dare you--   
  
Treize:*cover Wufei's mouth* If anyone takes that stick out of Wufei's butt. it'll be me.   
  
Wufei:Mmmff!!!!   
  
Treize:*forgets about real bug* Shoo shoo!*kicks bug killers out*   
  
Treize:Now dear Wufei. let us bathe*carries Wufei to hot tub*   
  
Wufei:*passes out*   
  
Treize:*sigh**pulls Wufei's head from bottom of tub and sits him upright* I guess I can't let you drown. You will tell me why the cobwebs I gave you didn't work on Troman. You silly dragon. what a horrible villain you make. *unaware that he is being spied on by supposed bug on ceiling*   
  
Vamp: *stuck on Trieze back listening in*   
  
Trieze: wooo its so itchy! *drops Wufei and reaches for back scratcher and trys to scratch his back*   
  
Vamp: Oo.....*Butt is getting itched by back scratcher*   
  
Trieze: thats funny...I didnt feel it on my back...*reaches behind him*   
  
Vamp: OO;; *crawls onto his head*   
  
Trieze: *Reaches all on his back* hmmm nothing there must have been my imagination...*uses back scratcher and scratches back*   
  
Wufei: *gurgle gurgle*   
  
Trieze: oh yea.. *reaches in to get Wufei*   
  
Wufei: *sits up coughting his head off* ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL ME!?!?   
  
Trieze: why no dear Wu-dragon *starts to get in tub with Wu when he looks at Wu and sees his expression* What is it lil' Dragon?   
  
Wufei: O.O;;;;;;;;;   
  
Vamp: *makeing shh sign*   
  
Wufei: Um...nothing...um....I was just ...um ...looking..at your hair! yea your hair...   
  
Trieze: oh really you like it? *moves hand up to make his fingers go threw his hair*   
  
Vamp: *moves over some so he dont touch her but make fingers go threw hair*   
  
Trieze: now how about that bath!   
  
Cat: Psst.............*calling wu fei* OI......Wu-chan!   
  
Wu fei: *hear something* huh? *look around*   
  
Trieze:what is it? My pretty dragon......   
  
Wu Fei: er.......Nothing? *look around*   
  
Cat: *look at Vamp who's hanging on Trieze's head* Oi.....*showing Vamp hand language* [Tell Wu-chan to hang on! The others is comming!!]   
  
Wu fei: *thinks* [shit.....what is that neko up to?] *eye Vamp*  
  
Vamp: *does hand language to tell Wu that the others are coming*   
  
Wufei: /thinking : thats good..../   
  
Trieze: *zooms over and wraps his arms around wu*   
  
Wufei: /Thinking again : this is not good.../   
  
Vamp: *about to barffor some unknown reason.....maybe the hair gel Trieze uses smells?*   
  
Wufei: um....trieze I left some good smelling stuff in the other room...hehehe....um...I will be right back....*runs out of the tub*   
  
*in other room*   
  
Wufei: *banging on the doors* They are locked!! ack! that sucks!   
  
*noise of throwing up sound from other room*   
  
Wufei: eeewww...   
  
Narrator: in the main time......   
  
Duo: *staring at Heero* i don't think Wu-man is here......Heero....   
  
Heero: What makes you so sure? *give Duo a look*   
  
Duo: Cos.....WE'RE STILL IN MY APPARTMENT AND THE DOOR YOU ARE TRYING TO BURST IN IS MY ROOM!!!!!!   
  
Quatre & Trowa: *sweatdrops*   
  
Heero: *sigh* okok.........let's go then.......   
  
Narrator: Back to Trieze's place. where Wu Fei is lock in with Trieze...   
  
Cat: *looking Wu-chan with laughter* /this is going to take the others forever...../   
  
Wu Fei: /i'm going to kill myself/   
  
Trieze: *getting close to Wu Fei* Oh~~~ My Prutty dragon...where are you going?   
  
Wu Fei: Er.......Nowhere? *backing off*   
  
Zechs: *climbs in threw the window* Hey Trieze why was your door....*GASP* Trieze! Are you...are you...cheating on me with...this child!?   
  
Trieze: O.o;;; why no Zechy...its...not what you think!   
  
Zechs: Trieze....I just cant belive you! Why!? Was I not good enough for you!?   
  
Vamp:*somehow on roof again*....*quite* woo this saves Wu-man for a little while...but everyone know Trieze and Zechs cant fight forever...soon in about...*looks at watch* 2 minutes they will agree on raping Wu-man...lol this is soooo much fun.   
  
Zechs and Trieze: *still fighting*   
  
Wufei: *trying to bust down door*  
  
Heero: *burst the down open* There!!! *the door fall on Wu Fei*   
  
Zechs and Trieze:*not notice the door and the pilots*   
  
Duo: *sweatdrops* I hear something while ya burst down the door....Heero.   
  
Heero: I hear nothing.....*step on the door*   
  
Wu Fei: O_O''''' Ah! *under the door. being step on*   
  
Trowa and Quatre: *Sweatdrops* We hear Wu Fei's voice comming under the door you're stepping on.....Heero...   
  
Heero: *standing on top of the door* I say i hear NOTHING!   
  
Wu Fei: *call under the door* Help??????? O_O'''''' Get the hippo off me!   
  
Duo: *push Heero away* Wu-man!!!!!!   
  
Wu Fei: -_-'' GOd.....Thany you guys......*eye Heero* and YOU.   
  
Heero: anything.....*grin*   
  
Zechs and Trieze: *stop and notice the door and the pilots is here*   
  
Cat: *Jump down from the wall* Gatta go guys!!! *drag Wu Fei away*   
  
___________________________________________________________  
  
An old old Webdrama from Hujoshi days....Will it be completed?! only time will tell.... 


End file.
